twisted observation

One day, I decided to take a back seat and observe as the world moves around me. As expected, no one noticed that I was the only one sitting still. The rest are in motion, too busy to notice, too engrossed to care.

It made me think, do people only care when they have the time for it? Interesting isn't it? Admit it, we have all been guilty of forgetting to care on plenty of occasions. Its not that we don't care, we just don't have the time for it. Because we need to care more for our needs before we can afford to care for something else.

Ah, the selfish human nature. Even the most loyal and giving of human beings are selfish. Who cares what has the world come to? The world hasn't come to anything. As usual, everyone puts their needs first and people act "shocked" at how cold society has become. Oh come on. Stop being hypocrites. Ultimately, it is yourself who have to help you. And in the process of helping yourself, you unintentionally neglect the rest. And the neglected somehow pass by without seeing you; they are neglecting you as well.

Interesting. We only see ourselves until we choose to make time for something or someone else.

Hmmm... now, do you think I am twisted? ;)

got me thinking

Guess the lyrics:

"Just gonna stand there and watch me burn, but that's alright cos I love the way it hurts~~~"

Even a monkey can tell that its the song from Eminem ft Rihanna - Love The Way You Lie. You must be dumber than a monkey to not know this.

Anyhoo, I love Eminem. His lyrics can be really meaningful for most times. And this song including the video tells of an abusive relationship. I like how it is from the viewpoint of the people who are stuck in such a relationship, instead of outsiders witnessing the abuse. Because, outsiders can never fully understand how it is like, unless if they themselves used to be abused.

The other day, Honey M asked me, would you leave the person that you love despite knowing that you are being abused?

*Slap!* Nyahahhahahah! (K la, k la, not funny)

Sorry. I digressed with the above picure. But back to the topic, it was a difficult question to answer. The logical (and supposedly quick) response would be "Yes". But what if he abuses you, and after that become very sweet and seemingly remorseful? Because you love him so much, you are willing to give him chance after chance after chance. You take the abuse, because you would rather stay with him than imagine being with someone else who could treat you better and you'd give excuses like, but he is really sweet to me afterwards.

OK, something more serious

You are willing to live that way because there is always the sweet in bittersweet. The saying 'you must first learn to love yourself before others can love you' seem to play little significance. Its not that you don't love yourself, but you love him more than yourself. In the end, you get used to it and find pleasure in pain. After a while, it is what keeps you going. The thought of a smooth life becomes bleak.

It really is tough to leave, even though the other partner is aware that he/she is being abused. The love in such a relationship is so intense that you cannot deny that there is no love; its just in a sick and twisted way.

Btw, this is just my naive and sick and twisted opinion and this in no way generalizes all abused partners in a relationship. Hate it, love it, whatever. Its my blog.

i have no life

My life has flown out of the window. Nothing inpires me anymore, I am neither happy nor sad. Hence, I can never revive my blog back to how it used to be. That is, until I get my life back. But 'til then, I'll be stuck with this dead thing of a blog.

Making myself happy everyday is a struggle, but hey, at least I made the effort right? So, generous me has decided to share my effort with all you nature-lovin' peeps out there. Don't worry, this isn't about environmental love. Its love for beautiful bodies. Oh yeaaa...

Feast ur eyes on the Armani ads featuring Megan Fox and Christiano Ronaldo. (Ready ur drool buckets yo!)

Hope I made y'all horny cos I sure did it to myself. FML.

its killing me but i love it!

Shoes. In particular, heels. That's the mass murderer of women's feet since time immemorial. If you've watched the first Sex in The City, you would definitely recognise Carrie Bradshaw's infamous quote which goes something like this: "These heels are killing me! But I love it!"

Yeaaa...

Got a test in London last week which hopefully, would lead to an interview but so far, no news from them yet. So, screw the crossed fingers! Not hoping for anything anymore; on to the next application! But anyway, this 'trip' to London was perfect excuse for me to get a new pair of heels! I mean, I really needed it. Despite my shoe collection (why are shoes so expensive here?!), I do not have a pair of proper black, closed-toe heels for work/interviews/formal attire. I noticed I have more party stilletoes and summer slippers than anything remotely useful for formal wear or even the cold climate in this country.

I'm not a bimbo.

So, I bought myself this pair.

Pweeeettttyyyy, right? But u guessed it, really uncomfortable. Not particularly running-around-in-London material. And since I was literally in them the whole day, my feet is still having blisters 'til today. No joke! Walking around in them slowly is killing me already but you know how fast people move in Underground. Fuck, its like they levitate-fly from one line to another. So, I also have to levitate-fly or be cursed the entire day. FML.

But. I. Don't. Care. Because. I. Look. Chio.

And I shall wear them again.