Dear God, why?

4th January 2011. Just received news that my dog is dying, suffering badly from cancer, blood all over, rotten flesh, barely able to move and eat, and she will be put to sleep to end her misery.

Dear God, WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHYYYYYYYYYYYYYY??????????!!!!!!!!!


I don't know how much longer I can take this shit.

as i dance with the devil tonight...

2010 has come and gone. And every new year, or at least, the end of it, it has never failed to bring me heartache. I'm beginning to fear New Year celebrations. Is there such a thing as a new beginning?

31st December 2010. I got my heart broken 2 minutes before the clock struck midnight.

2nd January 2011. I received heart wrenching news.

3rd January 2011. I am struggling to live normally and put a smile on my face.

In my mind, I imagined that someone psycho is going to kill me. Funnily, I wasn't scared. I just laid on the ground and started laughing. And I prayed to God to forgive me. And I prayed for my brother to grow up and take care of my parents. And I closed my eyes. Then the whole thing ended. Funny, huh? I couldn't even imagine the ending to this story. Will the killer pause, and start crying with me? Or will I flame his anger, and he stabs me repeatedly?