worst pick up line ever

So I went to Rev's last Thursday with mah gurls. Its been too damn long since we last clubbed. I know, I know. Its not like us to be such geeks. But we have good reasons to stay in the whole time:
1) My passport was stolen - no entry into clubs
2) Its too bloody cold - temperatures dropped to -8 degrees! How on earth to dress slutty leh?
3) Its damn expensive to club - entrance fee and drinks prices, its in pounds, ppl!

Anyhow, the no-clubbing spell was finally over. Its not like a huge chunk of money fell from the sky for us; we were just too shit sick of staying in, its not even funny. We became so fucking lame, I swear our brain must've been slightly damaged to say the least, from no clubbing.

Take for example Naima's damn lame and cold joke --> What baker doesn't wash his hands when he bakes?
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Answer: Ted Baker.


Wtf. Lame or not, u tell me. Lame until wanna die.

Camwhore also become lame liao. Somebody save us!

I is loving my new top!

Ok, ok. Back to the topic. We went to try out Rev's cos we heard that its good. But we made the fatal mistake of not going on a Student Night. Drinks were more expensive (a pint of Carlsberg costed £3.40 for goodness' sake!) and there were loads of dirty old men around.

These dirty old men were perverted and touchy-feely and could not stop ogling. Granted, we were the hottest babes in the club that night cos the only ladies around were old aunties! And guess what, those dirty bastards video-ed us dancing. Shit disgusting, right?

And this working man tried to pick me up with possibly, one of the worst lines ever!

See the bastard at the back?

Bastard: Hey, I like ur shirt! What do you call ur shirt?
Wildberry: Erm... shirt?
Bastard: Oh... hahahaha! Nice shirt!


And then, when Maria and I danced, he danced up to Maria first and poor babe! She felt him get a hard-on while she grinded him. Ewwww~~~ Solid proof that men think with their dicks. It was an innocent grind, u idiot. Hmmm... but grinds can never be innocent, can they?

;)

My next conversation with him went like this.

Bastard: Hey, my friend is kinda shy. Would u and ur friends mind dancing with him?
Wildberry: Em... I think my friends are shy too. Sorry.
Bastard: You don't seem shy. Would u dance with him then?
Wildberry: (Looks at B's friend) Sorry, nope!
Bastard: Would you dance with me then?
Wildberry: Ok!

LOL! In my defense, he was the best looking one in the club so far! Of cos, that's if I do not consider my French friend, Ben who was easily the hottest guy around. Bastard's friend was seriously pe-ta-han ugly lor! No way am I going to grind such an ugly!

Ben

But then, Bastard wasn't all that bad. At least he bought us a drink before leaving the club with his friends.

"Waaa-haaaa! I is got a drink!"

Ok la. He's not a bastard la. I upgrade him to... guy.

-___________-"

Shit. I need more clubbing!

Just because. Hahahahha!

If you want to read more about clubbing in Rev's, click this --> click click!