catfight with the ex

So, I went to Bournemouth last Tuesday to visit someone.

Need I say more?

Omg. I miss the beach so much! The sand, the sun, the water and of course, that special someone.

*winks*

But that special someone had a psychotic ex who hacked into his Skype and decided to come after me. Firstly, she was up against a law graduate and her command of English was so-so. The very interesting conversation is pasted below. Its a very entertaining read.

who r u? y u writing to my boy friend? dont u have respect to urself?
*** Missed call ***
*** Missed call ***
u fucking bitch stop writing
did u get it?
cant u pick up ur fucking skype
u such a chicken
*** Missed call ***
*** Missed call ***
oh gosh u such a bitch :)
and chicken u cant even answer i ll kick ur ass if u will write him again
thats sos tupid u know coz he wants to fuck u nd nothing more believe me
he cant have relationships with non russian speaker
*** Missed call ***
*** Missed call ***

i stepped out for awhile and so much rubbish got dumped here... my gawd....

don`t write to him
u get me?
I will not let him go

who the fuck are u?

I am hiz girlfriend
we live together
are u *wildberry who calls him all day?

ur living in ur little world arent u?
get out a bit and smell some fresh air
hopefully that will give u a bit of brains
thats all u can come up with?

u r not the first person who tried to take him from me

omg
u are such a sad creature

i will not let him go, I love him, u don`t know how much I love him, he is all my life and I will not let u bitch to take him from me

tough luck honey
i dont know how much u love him and i never will
but i know one thing
he doesnt love u anymore
stop being delusional

thats not true

keep telling urself that

every couple have some misunderstandings and difficulties

hopefully u'll be able to move on
yea, i know
but i think its pretty obvious urs just cant be saved anyore
so stop being such a loser abt it

u r really bitch
u don`t know what love is

and what do u tink u are?
ur an even bigger bitch for doing this underhanded shit
and u call that love?
grow up, stupid

when u love someone u do everything to keep kim
aren`t u?

when u love someone, u want them to be happy
how stupid are u?

u bitch I will find u and kick ur ass

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!
that made my day

what the fuck all bitches around?

u are one urself honey

y aren`t u find different guy?

honey, i didnt find him

so?

we just found each other
and the chemistry was there

there is so many other guys, just choose any of them

i dont settle for 2nd best

u must be qite pretty as he has good taste, but u r really bitch

yep
i am Queen Bitch
in case u dont know who ur messing with

dont mess with me

but at leat i am not a psychotic ex
who's messing with u?

I am not ex

u started it
gawd, u really are delusioanl

I know he loves me too

this is so entertaining
yea, he loves u which is why he is with ME
mmmm~
interesting relationship u got there

its all temperary
he will dump u

ah, if u want to think like that
i cant stop u
he already dumped u
i understand
it must be pretty hard on u
tell u what, eat more chocolates

I do everything for him, I cook, clean wash his stuff

its the next best thing to sex

what can u do for him?

hon, if ur not good enough then ur not

u bloody englich bitch

hahahhahahahah
who said i'm english?

or chinise what ever

hahahahhahahahha!
u dont even know who i am and u want to come find me?
laughable

I know that u live in reading

so?

he went there few weeks ago

i knw that u live in bournemouth
so?
jealous?

bitch

HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAH!
thank u
i think ur a heck of a bitch too

u will c as soon he sees how shit u r as house wife he`ll dump u
I`m sure u r shit in it
as all u bitches sre

ah, i admit i might not be as good as a housewife as u
but thats cos i have a life
u may be a good housewife
but too bad he left u

I learnt everything just to be with him

honey, get a life

I have boody life!

oh reaaaalllyyy?
thats news to me

u get another boyfriend

no thank u
i got a good one right here
i think u need to get another one

just becouse he is best in sex doesnt mean he is so good as a boyfriend he asks a lot
and he`ll dump u

u just said that he's not good as a bf
yet u want to keep him?
my gawd... do u even know what u want?

he asks a lot

btw, i think he's a great bf
so, i ask a lot too
we compromise

do u ever cooked?
do u ever cleaned?

what, are u my mother now?
ppfffttttt
stp making urself sound like a maid, its not sexy

he`ll dump u as all of bitches he dumped before

and ur one of those bitches which he dumped

and he even will not remember ur name

must be sad being u
HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA!
if he doesnt rmb my name, how would u know it then?

I will not let him go

too bad honey, he is already gone from u

as soon he comes I will talk to him and tell how bitch u r and useless

sure thing

bitch!

i'd like to see how will that turn out for u
the streets will be cold tonight
rmb to bring a thick duvet along

u now what, u fuck off from my boyfriend

ohhhh... he's like a drug to me.... so addictive mmmmmm~~~~

otherwise I will make sure u will be the most ugly girl

just cos ur ugly, dont get jealous now
its alright to be ugly
u'll live
^^

u have no idea, how many guys does after me bitch
have u ever see me?

of course
i think ur gorgeous too physically

what?

heck, i'd even fuck u
but ur ugly from the inside
and thats the worst honey

u`d fuck me?
u bitch

HAHAHAHAHHAHAHA!
sorry, i dont fuck ugly ppl

are u BI?

maybe u;d be better off with some fat bastard

look, why u wont find other guy from ur town?
its long distance between u any way?

why do i need to look further when i already have a good one?
clearly distance doesnt matter
he's living with u and guess whr is his gf from
reading!
open ur pretty little eyes a bit bigger pls

u bitch
he is womanizer n u r just one of j
one of his collection
and nothing more

and u are just his maid
nothing more
and ur master doesnt need u anymore
so i think its high time u got a life

h loves me I know it bitch

whatever~~~

oh fuck off

hahahhahahah!
then why confront me in the first place?


Entertaining eh? Why does drama always look for me, though?

yep, i did it

After 2 years of contemplating, I finally got the guts to get my belly pierced. Adrenaline rush, baby!

Wanna see my navel? Want, want, want??? Nyehehehe!

Here u go

I am sooo lovin' it! Its definitely an unnecessary splurge; a fucking £33 including aftercare solution but zomg, its worth it. Pain? Cheh. Its an ant's bite. No blood, no fuss. Tongs to clip the skin up, a bloody thick and sharp metal rod up ur navel, ring goes in and voila! I have a body accessory now.

Takes 3-12 months to fully heal, depending on the person. With my sensitive skin I just have to be extra careful.

^^

constipated

For 2 daysssssss!!!!!!!

Took laxative but my gawd, what came out was only enough to fill a teaspoon. To make matters worse, I've had gas in my stomach for days!!! So uncomfortable! I walk around feeling bloated and gassy all day long but I don't fart or burp much.

Wtf.

Did my asshole just shrink or something?! Aaaahhhhh!

Neway, I made myself some strong ginger water and Moko was kind enough to gimme some tablets which were supposed to rid gas and poo from my system. Less than 15 minutes later, she went to the toilet and I just sat there on my gassy arse and watched TV. Ngiao.

Lets hope tmr when I wake up I am gas and poo free. Sigh. Don't wanna go to Bournemouth on Tuesday with a fucking gassed-up bowel. I'm supposed to look sexy, for God's sake!